Just One Joey

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

30 Days Of Genius Blog: Mark Cuban

Who doesn’t want to get advice from Mark Cuban? This blog is designed to answer common questions with the spirit of Mark Cuban, using answers given to Chase Jarvis during his 30 Days Of Genius series. I went through the interview, pulled out the nuggets, and am serving them on a silver platter for you. Cutting out the stuff you don’t need (because it takes up time, and you will read the time is THE most valuable commodity), and I am handing you the gems.

Look for a blog for all 30 Days of Genius episodes as they are being released on iTunes.

Enjoy!

What should I do for a living?

Make sure it is something you love to do, and something you are actually good at. You can love basketball, but if you are short or can’t shoot, it’s time to find a new sport.

The best place to start looking is where you are already spending your time. What do you spend most of your time on? What “itch” do you need to scratch? What do you enjoy learning about? A very important thing to understand is that you need to LOVE learning. The worst situation to be in is when you are in a meeting and someone knows more about your industry and your company than you do. If that happens, you lose, or you will soon. Business is cutthroat. Everyone is out to kick your ass. If you don’t love learning about a particular industry, that is a sure fire way to know it is not the industry for you. Business is the ultimate sport. It is 24–7, 365, and extremely competitive. There is no off-season. You have to be driven in whatever you choose to do, or you will lose. A lack of drive in your particular industry is a red flag. Be self-aware enough to recognize that. Don’t fall in love with someone else’s story, write you own. You may not be Michael Jordan, but you could be Magic Johnson.

Please don’t try to be the next Mark Cuban, or the next Zucks, you need to be the next you. YOU are already spending time on things YOU enjoy. YOU know what you are good at. YOU know what you suck at. YOU know how you think, and YOU know how you work. Focus on what you are good at and then team up with people who compliment your strengths with their strengths. Again, be self-aware enough to recognize that.

Everyone talks about passion. Don’t follow your passion, follow your effort. Get out there and do things, work hard. There are things you may be great at that you don’t even know about because you haven’t tried yet. Get your hardhat on and start grinding. I didn’t love computers until I started coding, and that is the foundation of everything I have done. What if I hadn’t sat down to figure that out? What are you missing out on?

As you learn, and continue to learn, you will start to see combinations of things, new ways of doing things, and that’s when you know you have something good. You will combine everything you are learning and crunch it together with everything you already know to make something new or better. I am always looking for what I already do, and how I can combine that with businesses I bring in to create something bigger or better.

All of this learning and hard work is molding you and helping you discover what you are wired to do, and that’s the goal isn’t it? Putting yourself in the best position to win? That’s what I thought. After you figure out what you are wired to do, you can stop lying to yourself about whatever story you have been tell yourself, and that’s when you can really sell yourself. You will know what you are good at, and you will know what you can sell. You were wired to do A, B or C, and you can get paid to do it.

Being in this position will help you be successful because: you are already drawn to it, you are busting your ass, and those things are vital to success because you have to be able to work tired. You have to be able to go the extra mile in meetings, in learning, in preparing, and in delivering. Being wired for it means all of those things are just a little bit easier for you than the person who isn’t.

Necessary Traits

Remember this formula: Learning + Hustle/Grinding/Hardwork = Success.

Because you work hard, you will out work the competition. Because you are learning, you will out create the competition. That’s what it is all about. Either you want to win, or you don’t. If you’re napping, I am going to kick your ass. And everyone else out there is looking for a way to kick your ass. Always remember that. Always be working. Always be grinding. Because when you aren’t, someone else is.

With all the learning, and all the grinding, you will be more prepared, and preparation is what allows you to mitigate your risk. Being an entrepreneur (a successful one) is not about taking risks. It’s about going all in and working your ass off. It is about having goals, then putting things that help you reach those goals on the top of your list, and discarding the rest. Self-awareness, once again, is key. Time is the one thing you can never own. Make sure you are spending your time on things that matter: your family, your business, your knowledge, your health. All the other stuff is taking away time from your goals. You can never get back yesterday. You can’t re-do right now. Make the difference while you can right now.

Money and Small Businesses

Avoid raising money at all costs. I know it sounds crazy, but if you are taking money you are already failing because you aren’t able to do it on your own. Live like a student. Work lean. Stay Hungry, Stay Smart. You don’t need to be a $100 millionaire, you need to reach your goals.

You focus should be, in this order: sweat equity, customer equity, Kickstarter (some other fundraiser) equity, then venture capital money. People walk away from great businesses all the time with very little because of the fundraising. It is better to work lean, live lean, and build slow, then take on money, take on people you need to listen to, and lose your company.

Remember, venture capital money = failure.

I know what you are going to ask, how do I know when I am on the something? When I first started streaming, I got a call from the Aleutian Islands. When people are calling from a place you can’t even find on a map, that’s when you know you have something.

Fun Facts About Mark Cuban

Mark owns a lifetime pass on American Airlines at the cost of $250,000. You can’t buy them anymore.

He is a dad first.

His best friends are the same ones he had in college.

He is a bad piano player,

a bad singer,

and he is horrified of heights.

Quote

“Out work. Out last. Out hustle.”

Mark Cuban Links

Alyssa’s Healthy Cookies

Cyberdust

AXSTV

Dallas Mavericks

Chase Jarvis Links

Joey Links

Tips For New Parents?

Hindsight is 20–20.

I hate it, but it’s true.

I wish foresight was 20–20 and hindsight was blind as a bat, but that is not the way it works. We usually overthink the past and under-think the future.

Hopefully for all of you new parents or soon-to-be-parents, this can help you avoid some issues you may not even be thinking about.

Crib, diapers, clothing, food, pumps, wipes, etc.

These are the things we focus on when we have a child.

Hopefully you are also asking yourself “Am I going to be a good parent?” and “What steps am I going to take to be a good parent?”

If not, now is the time to start.

The Goal Of Parenting

Your child should walk out the door at 18 and be filled with: confidence, self-awareness, grit, problem-solving skills and humility. If they aren’t, it is your fault. Sorry, but it is. If your child is a bum, it is your fault in some capacity. If you are a parent of an older child, and they are a loser, it’s your fault. I’m sorry. Just speaking the truth.

My youngest daughter is 7. If she is a loser, or a stripper, or whatever else I would never want her to be, it’s my fault.

My oldest is almost 25. And although I wasn’t in her life until she was 16, if she is a loser, I am a failure (or I could be a dick and blame my wife and her dad J, but they are both awesome, so I won’t….maybe).

Guiding Your Child

This is either a one step or a two-step approach.

1. One Step Approach: You are not perfect. Some of you are more obviously-not-perfect than others. Whatever your level of non-perfection is, your child has some of that non-perfection as well. It is your job to give them the skills to mitigate those imperfections so they don’t make their life more difficult than it needs to be.

What are you thinking right now? Kids are hardheaded? They are going to do what they want? Well then my friend, you or your partner are/were the same way and it is your job to work around that.

Being a parent is being flexible. There is not a handbook to follow because people are different, kids are all different, and they respond to different things. But you are your child’s parent, they have your genes, they have your partner’s genes, and you should know yourself well enough to help them navigate potential pitfalls and issues. If not….

2. The Two Step Approach: You will need to do this before you do the one step approach. This is fairly simple: Figure Your BS Out!

That’s it! Easy peasy lemon squeezy!! Yay!!

Just kidding, this is not easy at all. It is simple, but not easy. Ah, such is life.

What is wrong with you?

What do you suck at?

Are you a bad listener?

Are you lazy?

Are you unhealthy?

Are you fat?

Do you drink too much?

Drugs?

Cheat?

Are you a liar?

What’s your problem(s)?

See what I mean? This part sucks, but it is vital to your child being everything you want them to be. The good news is, if you want your kid to be a piece of shit, then you are probably a piece of shit, and you can just keep doing what you are doing. Nice work.

Kids see and hear everything. They take it all in. You can’t hide things from kids. They can feel it and sense it. They are more in tune with themselves than we are as adults because they just feel, they don’t over or under analyze. They see you drink. They see you lie. They see you be mean to their mother. They see you get angry, get sad, they see it all.

How Do You Fix Yourself?

I would suggest that you go see a therapist. Honestly speaking, if you haven’t figured your shit out yet, why would you be able to “flip the switch” and figure it out by yourself now?

A therapist will help you honestly navigate through your emotions and your actions to help you be a better you, a better partner, and a better parent. I suggest you find a therapist that specializes in behavioral modification or cognitive behavioral therapy. If you are in the Bay Area and want a suggestion please message me and I will give you the name of an amazing therapist. I mean UH-MAZING.

I went to a different therapist for a few months before switching to the amazing one. He was focused on my past and why/how that led to behaviors in the present. It was a bunch of hooey. It’s like he was looking for something to pin my stupidity on rather than just me being stupid. He was making mountains out of molehills. Totally worthless. I got more out of one session with the good one than 2 months of sessions with the bad one. Unless they are helping you change, get out of there. CBT is the way to go. Not the Betty Draper crap.

Once you figure out your garbage you can help your child navigate through their garbage. Now you are parenting. You can help them avoid the pitfalls that you fell in to.

It’s that what it is all about?

Reading Suggestions

These three books are f’ing awesome. I recommend them to everyone, but especially new parents.

The mindset that these books will put you in as a teacher, and that’s what you are as a parent, a

teacher, is phenomenal. Some stuff will seem obvious, but if you can reflect on your upbringing, and how you are raising your child, these books are priceless.

Mindset by Carol Dweck

Grit by Angela Duckworth

The Art Of Learning by Josh Waitzkin

And if you want to read what it’s like to totally mess up, but then get passed it, you can always read my book! Prison Diary(a) — A San Quentin Comedy, Kinda.

Thoughts

You only have one life. You only have one chance to give your child everything. Don’t take it for granted. It is never too late to start being a good parent, changing the narrative on your past, but it is much easier to never make the mistake in the first place. I hope you have the foresight to recognize that and take the steps necessary to give something amazing a chance to be spectacular.

“A smart man learns from his mistakes, but a wise man learns from others’ mistakes.”

iTunes or Soundcloud

Monday, July 11, 2016

Let's Make The Home Run Derby More Exciting

Hands down, the greatest home run derby ever was Fenway Park, Boston, MA 1999.

Mark McGwire, hitting the ball down the damn street.

It was amazing.

I used to love the Home Run Derby.

Though it has gotten a little stale, I like that the MLB tried to spice it up by adding more time at the end of the rounds if you hit more home runs. That is pretty exciting, but I am afraid one of our home run heroes will have a heart attack after 10 minutes of hard swinging, trying to get one more over the wall, completely exhausted.

So here is my solution:

Right now each home run is worth one point.

What if certain home runs were worth 2 points? Or 3 points? Or 4?

The further the home run, the more points you get.

Here is my breakdown of Petco Park for tonight’s home run derby. Each section is colored and labeled for the home run value assigned to each section of the park.

Let’s say Giancarlo Stanton only hits 6 home runs, but they are all off the scoreboard because he is

swinging out of his butt, that’s 24 points.

I am basically taking the Golden State Warriors approach (we got KD!!!) to the home run derby. Less “baskets” but more points = more exciting.

Would you rather see Steph layup 15 times or drop 10 from beyond the arc?

Exactly!

You could still have 10 outs, or 5 outs, or whatever, depending on the round, but now you could rack up points by launching the ball further.

All of the fans get different colored shirts based on the section they are sitting in, so the visual is amazing in the park AND on TV.

Save the players from exhaustion. Give the fans something incredible (like the ’99 Derby). And own the top 10 tonight on ESPN, the Twittersphere, Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook.

Who is with me?

Joey

PS — Anyone going to the game in San Diego, do yourself a favor and go to Dick’s Last Resort. Food is good but the staff is incredible. Beer, meat and ball busting. Such a good time. ~ Free advertisement for Dick’s. You’re welcome.

iTunes or Soundcloud

Saturday, July 9, 2016

What Is Wrong With Cops?

Man, where do I start?

There are so many things wrong with cops.

#1 is they are just like us.

They are human.

If we are honest, we have a lot wrong with us too.

We are human.

We make mistakes.

Within every group of people there are the best and worst versions of the group as a whole.

There are good doctors and bad doctors.

There are good lawyers and bad lawyers.

Good Muslims and bad Muslims.

Good Christians and bad Christians.

Good cops and bad cops.

The issue comes from the inclusion of the “bad” with the group as a whole. Just because some Christians are bad, doesn’t mean they all are. I mean, look at the Crusades. Holy crap. Could they have looked more brutal and violent? Similar to the way the extreme Muslims are today. But not all Muslims are extreme Muslims. Not all Christians were crusaders. Remember that.

But it is dangerous also to protect everyone in a group. Good cops protecting bad cops is intended to strengthen the group, but in the long run, it just breaks it down. This is very similar to the Catholic Church. Have you seen Spotlight? What did the church do? Protected the bad priests. What did it do? Fractured the religion as a whole. All because they wanted to protect the shitheads. Just like this.

When a cop makes a mistake, and we all make mistakes, they need to be held accountable just like everyone else. This is not an attack on police officers, this is to make sure the institution stays strong.

We need police. They protect us. They are designed to keep us safe. When they don’t do that, those individuals, and they are just individuals, need to go.

I am not talking about every instance a cop shoots someone. If you have a gun, if it’s out, I do not have much pity for you if you get shot. As sad as it is, if I pull a gun out against other people with guns, no matter who they are, I am just asking to get shot. I would love to see cops use rubber bullets and block guns (because I don’t think anyone is staying on the offense with 25 rubber bullets up their ass), but we aren’t there yet.

I am talking about when a cop has someone on the ground. When two cops have someone on the ground, and instead of holding them down, they pull out their gun and shoot. Totally unnecessary. Inexcusable. You are a professional. You have been trained to deal with situations like this and you failed. You should be held accountable. Bad cop.

I am talking about when a father is in the car, complying with the officer, pulling out his ID and he gets shot in front of his child. Doing everything right? Complying? No resistance? And you still get shot? Bad cop.

Selling cigarettes on the corner in NYC? Getting murdered in a chokehold on camera? And nothing happens? Bad cop. Horrible cop. But they are still on the force. They are still out there, a shit cop who does not do their job well, and the man he failed is 6ft underground. His family sitting down for dinner without him. No more birthdays. No more memories. Nothing. For selling cigarettes and crossing paths with a bad cop.

This is the issue.

The only thing wrong with cops is they are human. They make mistakes. Just like us. Some are stupid. Just like us. Some are scared. Just like us. Some are terrible at their job. Just like us.

If a doctor made an egregious error, they would lose their license.

If a lawyer did his job poorly, they would be disbarred.

If an officer fails his community, fails the situation, he gets protected, he gets suspended, and then he gets his job back. Same city. Same gun. Same badge. Same bad cop.

You are trained to diffuse the situation. You are trained to serve and protect. You are trained to assess a situation and determine if it is dangerous or not, life threatening or not. You are a professional at all those things.

Professional baseball players that can’t hit, get cut.

Professional wide receivers that can’t catch, get cut.

If a professional police officer doesn’t do their job, and they don’t do it so badly that people die, they

rarely if ever lose their job.

That’s an issue.

I love cops.

They are vital to our lives whether you like to admit it or not.

They make mistakes.

But the biggest problem is with the protection of the ones that make mistakes. The ones that should not be cops in the first place. At least the ones that shouldn’t be cops any more.

You are only as strong as your weakest link.

Officers. With all due respect. You have some brittle links.

It is time to re-evaluate your position. Clean out the weak links. And strengthen the chain as a whole.

RIP officers in Dallas.

RIP every officer killed in the line of duty.

And

RIP murdered men and women at the hands of bad cops.

Protesters. Let your voices be heard. But please be a part of the solution, and not an extension of the problem.

Be safe out there.

iTunes or Soundcloud

Friday, July 8, 2016

How To Save A Truck Driver's Life

This article is extremely personal to me.

It is designed to shine a light and help a group of people very near and dear to my heart: truck drivers.

This Monday, July 4, 2016, I lost my uncle. He was a truck driver.

We were about as close as a nephew and uncle could be. Over the last few days I have been flipping through photo albums. Every picture, whether it be 1981, 1995, or 2015, we were smiling, we were having a good time.

But our photo album is complete. There won’t be any more additions. The last picture we had together he was dressed up like a cowboy princess, thanks to my daughter. He was a great guy. We all loved being around him.

Loved. Past tense.

On Monday he “threw a clot” in Mississippi on his way across the country for 100th? 200th? 300th time? Who knows? Too many to count. He knew this country like the back of his hand. He saw every inch of it in his 40+ years behind the wheel. He loved the road. When he was on vacation, what did he do? Traded in his 18 wheeler for a motorcycle, and hit the road. It was his life.

Even though he lived longer than many people do, saw more than almost all of us ever will, he is still gone to soon. They always are.

He developed a blood clot in his leg, he “threw” it, and he didn’t make it.

I want to make sure other families of truck drivers don’t have to feel the pain my family is feeling right now. Losing someone from something (potentially) preventable. Getting “that” phone call. We are all going to go eventually, we don’t need to speed the process up. We don’t need to rush in to that last breath.

Please share this with your family, spread the word and the information in these next few paragraphs.

Let’s keep our fathers and our uncles around longer. A little more time is all we are ever going to want in the end.

What is a blood clot?

It is basically a scab in your blood stream. It is formed to help repair damaged blood vessels, arteries, or veins.

Causes?

Heart conditions, post-surgery healing, especially where casts and splints are used.

Risks increase in people over 60.

Risks increase if they are: obese, diabetic, have high blood pressure, smoke, and experience prolonged inactivity (like driving for a living).

I am obviously going to focus on the prolonged inactivity, but I know there is a high rate of smoking, obesity and diabetes in the truck driving community, so please focus on those as well.

Symptoms

Clots can move in the body, that’s when they are really dangerous.

The ones that truck drivers need to be aware of are the ones in their legs. Look for: pain, redness, swelling, tenderness, a warm sensation or a pale or blue discoloration and coolness (because of lack of circulation).

When you throw a clot (a piece breaks loose), it can either go any number of places in your body, none of them good.

Heart: chest pain, shortness of breath, nausea, indigestion, and sweating (basically, a heart attack).

Brain: loss of speech, vision, and weakness on one side of the body (basically a stroke).

Lungs: chest pain, shortness of breath, and rapid pulse and breathing.

Intestines or other organs: abdominal pain, nausea, blood in stool.

The most important thing to take from this section is awareness. Be aware of how your legs feel.

Listen to your body. When you feel or notice any of these things, put your ego aside, put your haul aside and get your butt to the doctor, or the nearest emergency room. Your life is more important than anything you have in the trailer.

When To Call 911

When you feel chest pressure, have shortness of breath, have difficulty seeing, speaking or breathing.

This is a VERY serious situation. My last conversation with my uncle was telling him to go to the doctor because we was having chest and kidney pains. He said he took Tylenol and he was fine. Let that sink in. What if he went to the doctor? Maybe my photo album would have a few more good times with a wonderful man.

Prevention

Hydration: Drink plenty of fluids. We are talking water here people. Not sodas, Gatorade, any of that other crap. Remember, diabetics and obese people have a higher likelihood of clotting. We don’t want make it easier for the clots to form. You are already sitting for long periods of time, that’s help enough.

Move Around: Make sure you walking around every time you stop. If you are in for a really long haul that day, stop every few hours and walk around. If you are drinking enough water, like you should, you will have to stop and pee every few hours anyways. Take the time to get a few extra minutes of leg movement in.

Clothing: Wear loose fitting clothing. Not that truck drivers are known for traveling in skin tight leather pants or anything, but you know, just in case.

Sleep: When you sleep, elevate your feet above your heart.

Compression Socks. Wear them (you can get them at any Walmart or Target in the travel section).

Change Positions Regularly: Purposefully change positions. I know what you are saying, where the hell am I going to go in the truck? I get it, but shift your hips, take some pressure off of the backs of your legs throughout the day.

Now for the tough part: Health

1. Eat better

2. Lose weight

3. Stop smoking

4. Limit your salt intake

5. Take your meds.

I know this is all stuff you have probably heard before, but please take the consequences seriously.

If you have any questions on how you can change your diet, or you want to know if what you are eating sucks, please feel free to contact me in the comments section and I will be happy to work with you (for free by the way, this is supposed to help people, not make money). I know it is very difficult to eat well on the road, with the pressure of deadlines and the endless supply of fast food chains all along your routes, but there are ways.

Honesty

It can happen to you. Whether you are behind the wheel, or you love the person behind the wheel, it can happen to you.

It’s awful.

It’s sad.

And it doesn’t have to happen.

Be safe. Live Safe. Drive safe.

Over and out.

iTunes or Soundcloud

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

HOw Have My Views On Marriage Changed In My Life?

There are only two views to have on marriage: they are great or they suck.

You can have the same view your whole life, or it can evolve over time.

My bet would be that more views change from great to sucks, than sucks to great.

I am the former.

Great To Sucks

How could this happen? So sad. *sniff

I will tell you exactly, people story tell.

They story tell about their romance, their heartwarming tale of boy meets girl. They take what they want marriage and relationships to be and they project them on to their actual relationship. Love at first sight, high school sweethearts, good girl meets bad boy, etc. And they commit. Hell, they over commit. By the time they realize their relationship is poop it is too late and there is a ring on it, babies involved, the whole nine yards.

“You changed!”

“Where is the man/woman I married?”

“Waaa!”

They were never there.

You didn’t marry Noah (The Notebook)

You didn’t marry Jack (Titanic)

*for guys

You didn’t marry (fill in porn star name here, I don’t know any *wink *wink)

You filled in their gaps, their holes, with your story. What they were actually missing, you gave them. Why? Because it allowed you to have the fairytale you wanted. You had the perfect partner. You were going to beat the odds. They were going to write stories about your love. The problem is, they already wrote them, and you plagiarized your life with them.

Oopsie daisy.

Once it hits you, it hurts, bad. Along with the crumbling of your marriage comes the crumbling of your views on marriage. Marriage sucks. Boo matrimony.

Sucks To Sucks

Because you don’t have a very positive outlook on marriage, you don’t look for the perfect partner, you look for the okayest (made that word up, but it fits perfectly). You look for someone who you can tolerate, or fills out your checklist, has a good job, or whatever else is a mediocre measure to finding a partner. You half ass it going in, which leads to a half ass marriage, and it’s an “I told you so” for the rest of your life. You created a self-fulfilling prophecy. Nice work Casanova. “You can call me Nova.” — name that movie!

They look at the stats, and they look at how many marriages fail. They look at all the shitty relationships around them and go, “see!!”

They marry someone they don’t think is that great, or someone that they don’t feel they can be themselves around, or someone they need to hide things from.

They listened to the people, to the majority.

The problem is, most people are stupid. I am sorry if I offended you (but then why do you think you’re stupid?) We are at the bottom of education, we are the fattest, just look at this election? Holy moly! You think with this many idiots around you are going to get a good view of what marriage can really be?

“Come on man!!” — Chris Carter

If you are siding on the dumb-dumb majority, guess what? You’re a dumb-dumb!

Let that sink in, then read how it can be, how it should be.

Sucks To Great

This is me!! Tada!! This is how my view have changed!

I thought marriage was finding the person you tolerated the best. I am such a romantic.

Don’t fight much, nice person, would be a solid partner, mother (for my kids, not me. I have a mom), etc. I wasn’t looking for a best friend, I had enough guy friends. I wasn’t looking for soulmate, that’s a bunch of hooey. Nothing like that was real, it was just Hollywood, tricking us in to looking for bullshit, leading us down a path of misery and chasing a fantasy. I was WAY jaded.

I had great relationships to look to for inspiration.

But I listened to the dummies.

“That’s rare.”

“That’s a unicorn.”

“I’ll pick her, she’s perfect(ly just okay)!”

Then I met my wife.

And everything changed.

I loved being around her. We could hang out all day every day and I never got sick of her. I missed her when she was gone. She could hang with my friends. When I did something cool I wish she was there too, like something was missing without her. She was the first person I actually wanted to have a baby with (and thank God I didn’t have any babies with the “okay” ones). I could be myself (which then lead to me needing to figure out just who the hell I was. I will save that for another time). She was perfect. She was my best friend.

And it finally hit me.

This is what it is supposed to be like. That 1 out of 10 was what you were going for.

Tim Ferriss quotes Mark Twain all the time, “When you find yourself on the side of the majority, it’s time to pause and reflect.”

I was focused on the 9, not the 1.

I looked at it even worse than that. It was roulette. It was a crapshoot. No one could figure out which marriages work and which ones don’t.

But we do. F’ing Hollywood was right!

Damn you Noah and Allie!!!

- Marry your best friend.

- Marry the one you don’t get sick of.

- Marry the one you miss when they are gone.

- Marry the one you can be yourself around.

- Marry the one that makes you feel like forever isn’t long enough.

Then you can be the one.

The one that does it the right way.

You just have to know what you are looking for.

But more importantly, you have to know that you can actually find it.

iTunes or Soundcloud

Monday, July 4, 2016

Jon Vernon Logue

He was my buddy.

I can’t think of a better way to describe our relationship.

He was my uncle, but he was my buddy.

Was.

What a shitty word.

My buddy passed away today.

Exactly 365 days ago we were hanging out in my front yard, watching fireworks, drinking beer, and smoking Baccarat cigars.

Today, I got a call from my mom telling me that my buddy was gone. Her big brother, and my uncle.

Much too soon. But isn’t it always? Is it ever the right time? He wasn’t old, but what if he was? Would it have been the right time then? I don’t know, but it would have felt better, maybe.

Memories are racing through my brain.

Florida, 1985.

Hollister, 1988.

Middle of nowhere California in your truck, 1991.

My front yard, one year ago today.

You had the worst and the coolest job in the world, long haul truck driver. Sitting all day? Moving people’s furniture? That sounded awful.

Seeing every inch of the USA in your almost 67 years? Amazing.

You saw parts of this country I will never see. I admired you for that.

You were such a hard worker.

You were such a loving man.

You were The Hulk.

You gave me noogies.

No matter how old I got, or how old you got for that matter, you always let me know you would kick my ass.

We had a lifetime together. Well, mine anyways.

I don’t know if many people have relationships with their uncles like we had. I hope they do. An uncle and a buddy. It is a very special thing. You can’t have that kind of relationship with many people. We were able to get to a level where we would have been friends even without the family ties.

Fuck.

I am going to miss you.

Fuck.

I miss you already.

Standing in the same spot as last year. Looking at the same fireworks. But with no Uncle. I know you wouldn’t have been here anyways. You would have been driving across Mississippi, but it felt like there was a hole in the earth next to me tonight.

There is nothing I wish I had said to you. It isn’t like that. You knew I loved you. You knew how much I valued the man you were, the uncle you were.

My daughters loved you.

My wife loved you.

It was hard not to.

But you were a maniac on FB. So harsh, but I knew the real you. You were a teddy bear. But no left wing Democrat would EVER know that. It was hilarious reading your posts. I am not even sure maniac is the right word, but social media brings out different aspects of our personalities. They may not have known you, but I did. You weren’t that guy. You loved as well as anyone I know. You cared as much as anyone I ever met. Your heart was huge and your affection was pure.

I hope you went happy.

I hope the road was the perfect spot to send you off.

I hope you are up in heaven, out on a boat, smoking cigars, listening to some crazy, conservative talk

show host, and you are happy.

I can’t believe I am writing this. I can’t believe you’re gone.

You made my world a better place. I loved every phone call, every visit.

I am going to your favorite San Jose cigar store, buying a couple Baccarats, thinking about my buddy, and smiling.

I love you Uncle Jon.

Goodbye.

Joey