Everyone has something.
Whether it is big or small, it is all overwhelming to the person dealing with it.
Alcoholism, depression, ADHD, addiction, schizophrenia, etc.
They
are all cognitive disorders that may show signs as we grow up, but we
generally don’t get the full effect until we are old enough that we
should have known better. At least that’s how it was for me.
Once
you realize you have what you have, admit it, or give up, you need to
deal with it. “Knowing is only half the battle” — G.I. Joe (no relation
to me). What is knowledge without action? I’m not sure, but it’s not
good, especially when you are dealing with something as serious as a
cognitive disorder. None of them can be taken likely. If you are not
actively doing something about it, you are taking it WAY too lightly.
Me
I have ADHD.
The hyper kid in class?
Yes, that was me.
I
was the one in the corner all through elementary school because I could
not stop talking to whomever was near me. Didn’t matter who, I was
going to talk to you, whether you liked it or not. At least I was funny.
You may be irritated with me, but I would keep you entertained.
Thank
God I wasn’t born 10 years later, or I would have been on Ritalin, or
some other shitty drug.
One that allows you to behave in class but not
exactly thrive.
I
am not sure about the other disorders, but ADHD is awesome if you can
reign it in. There are a ton of perks to having an over-active, hyper
creative brain. As long as you are not using it for stupid stuff.
Or not
using it, which then leads to stupid stuff.
If
I was born ten years later, I would have known I had ADHD much sooner,
but I may have missed out on the benefits of controlling it naturally,
through meditation, exercise, and healthy living.
You Can’t Fix What You Don’t Know
‘The more that I know, the more I control.”
That line pretty much sums it up for me. Once I found out I had ADHD, two things happened.
1.
So many things that I was frustrated with growing up, thinking they
were me, and that I was just shitty at this or that, could be explained.
Poor test taking? ADHD. Getting in trouble all the time? ADHD.
Stressing out during an at-bat in a game, but crushing it when the
pressure was off in practice? ADHD. Poor decision making? ADHD.
2.
I learned that I didn’t have to be that person ever again. I knew what I
had, I learned about it, I applied the knowledge, and audited myself
until I was totally on point and could thrive.
I was in control for the first time in my life.
Sifting Through The Ashes
The
worst part about recognizing a cognitive disorder too late is there is a
mess to clean up. One that you created by not asking more questions
sooner, or recognizing that there was even a problem in the first place.
It is pretty much all your fault.
I am not talking s***. It was all my fault too.
If
you are on the other side of your issue (the good side I mean), I bet
you are pretty astounded that you didn’t notice the issues earlier.
Hindsight is 20–20. It is also very humbling.
This is where love comes in so handy.
Having
people believe in you is so vital. I am talking about unconditional
love. If you are in a position where people don’t believe in you, I am
really sorry. I am not sure I would be here if it wasn’t for my wife and
family. I had completely messed up and wanted to change so badly. I was
on fire to put in the work and make a difference. I don’t really know
what I got the second chance in the first place. Maybe she saw it in me,
saw that fire, knew I would fix it. Or maybe she just gave me a second
chance. Either way, I ran with it.
There
are so many people out there that talk a good game and are full of
s***. Actions speak much louder than words, especially in a situation
like this. You either make the changes or you don’t. There is a
best-practices for everything. You are either “best” practicing or you
aren’t. It becomes very obvious very early on in the process. Knowing
what I know now, I could talk to you and know within 5 minutes if you
were ready to change or not. If you make any kind of an excuse, you are
not ready, and I feel sorry for your loved ones. The ones that want you
to get better. That need you to get better. The ones that see the
goodness in you, and all the wonderful things you could be if you would
give yourself the chance. Excuses rob you and your family of that. Not
taking those actions rob you and your family of that.
Stop making excuses and “get action.”
You know you can do it.
You want to do it.
So do it.
Mental Health
Every day’s a holiday in my, every day’s a holiday in my head.
Don’t know what I’m gonna get.
Don’t know if it’s worth the risk, but I, swear that I can see some change, in all the things and all the ways,
I swear I’m worth it.
I know I’m worth it.
Don’t you say I can’t change….
Every day is hit or miss.
One step shy of an apocalypse, but I never thought to run away.
That’s a lie, but I’m right here, so try, remember all the little things, that make up all our memories
And know their worth it.
It’s all worth it.
Don’t you say I can’t change……
’Cause i am a cannon ball, and I got my aim.
don’t you say I can’t change……
’cause I am an asshole, ’cause I agree.
But the more that I know,
the more I control.
And everything that you saw in me,
is more than a hope,
it’s bringing me home,
to where i want to be
One day you’ll understand, that you mean more than every single breath.
That I need you, like sun and air.
I
just hope that you believe, that I’ve come a long way from the dark,
that damn near ripped us both apart, and have the pieces, to bring us
peace with
Don’t you say I can’t change……
’Cause i am a cannon ball, and I got my aim.
don’t you say I can’t change……
’cause I am an asshole, ’cause I agree.
But the more that I know,
the more I control.
And everything that you saw in me,
is more than a hope,
it’s bringing me home,
to where I want to be
And I want to be right here.
I belong to you belong to me.
Every place you go this fool will be.
Every day’s another day, to show you all that I can be, everything you’d ever want of me,
And I want to be right here.
Don’t you say I can’t change.
Don’t you say I can’t change.
Don’t you say I can’t change.
Don’t you say I can’t change.
’Cause i am a cannon ball, and I got my aim.
don’t you say I can’t change……
’cause I am an asshole, ’cause I agree.
But the more that I know,
the more I control.
And everything that you saw in me,
is more than a hope,
it’s bringing me home,
to where I want to be
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